Celibacy

There are few things that modern folk associate about the Catholic or Orthodox priesthood more than celibacy. It really is unfortunate but then again in such a sexualized society it appears to be the norm. One of the things, however, that is reflected in such an association is just how shallow our view of marriage is. It boils down to, “What can I get out of marriage?” And by “get” we assume sex. Sad. In my 20 plus years of marriage, there are so many things that I can claim to have “gotten” and sex is only one of them (and I might add it is not #1). As a matter of fact, perhaps the greatest of those things I have obtained in matrimony has more to do with what I and my spouse have given. But I’m ahead of myself.

First, we need to remember that celibacy is a discipline, not a dogma of the Church. That means that down through the centuries that discipline has been modified and adapted to the needs and situations the Church has found Herself in. What this reflects is that the present practice of celibacy in some families of the Church (I won’t use “rites” because the Latin, Byzantine and other “rites” of the church are more than just rites), has been drawn from over 20 centuries of experience. There is no celebrity or TV talk show host or TV preacher who can claim that level of experience. The present result is that in the Catholic and Orthodox Church, most priests are celibate. Some priests are married and they must have been married before they were ordained. All bishops are celibate. Never does a man presently ordained to the priesthood or episcopacy obtain marriage. Again, this discipline is a result of over 20 centuries of experience.

Second, we must also remember that the exception proves the rule. There may have been cases of Catholic/Orthodox priests who obtained marriage after their ordination and remained in the Church as priests in good standing (I know of only one modern case) but the norm is that a priest permanently stops functioning as a priest if he decides to marry. If a priest marries without the Church’s approval of his “laicization” he is contributing to his spiritual separation from Christ and His Church and, I might add, the marriage is invalid. This sort of act sets in motion a sacramental domino effect that has serious consequences for the former priest, his “spouse” and their children. This is probably one reason why the priest believes that he must leave the Church completely.

Finally, we need to remember that the vocation to celibacy and marriage are both blessed by God and that in the sin-infected human realm both have their “pros” and “cons”. I speak in practical terms here. As the Melkite bishops have claimed, there is no theological requirement for a celibate priesthood, but there is a spiritual heart to celibacy. It is the same as that of holy matrimony. It is the self-sacrifice of the one for the other, the giving of ones life for the beloved. The celibate St. Paul, in a brilliant expression, offers this analogy. The mystery of love between Christ and His Church is like that mystery of love between a husband and a wife. The celibate sacrifices many things, primarily himself, for the life of the Church. It points to a level of intimacy and union that will one day be manifested in the fullness of Christ’s self-disclosure. The married couple sacrifices many things, primarily themselves, for the life of the family and the Church. It points to a level of intimacy and union that will one day be manifested in the fullness of that same self-revelation of Christ.

I might add here that the celibate and married persons, if they persevere, are becoming and will become the complete human beings the Creator intended them to be. It is right there in the heart of the matter that both celibate and married “work out their salvation with fear and trembling.” The other side of that coin is that when the celibate or the married persons are unfaithful or surrender their vows they slip very close to the precipice of destruction and few have been able to recover. One very (and personal) note here is that this truth is more than just the choices and reality of individuals. The effect on all families and individuals, of parishes and national churches is pandemic. Like all essentially spiritual realities, a faithful warrior contributes to the defense of the entire camp. An unfaithful one quickly becomes the weakest link and the enemy’s main target. As a pastor I have been witness many times to what happens when the individual-ism lie “I have to be true to myself” takes effect; everybody suffers. We must be true to Christ who is the Way, and the Truth and the Life.

Fr. Miguel Grave de Peralta
Parish Administrator
St. Ignatius of Antioch Melkite Catholic Church
Augusta, Georgia